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Daily Dairy

Arsenal of emotions, words and memories, which refuse to boil down to junk and keep simmering until and unless they be jotted down!


miss miss miss...imminence..presence..
gloom..depth..dejection..aloof.. when so many vibes throng together to mindscape at one moment and stew for prolonged times, it's difficult to sort any o'em or make out any sense of the whole muddle! She plunged deeper in her heart's cavities, gradually all images blurred away and one etched out..him! He needed her, had slipped in the bottom of dark castle enshrined in sinister aura aired with forlorn ideation. There was the need of just a call, call of her voice, spilling out airy words that will soon, with a flick, sweep him away from that dreary vista. He would never call, for so an immaterial issue, she knew that, and so call of duty was for her. Just a call and then the mess soothed out...

Lips tightly shut, hands stuck by sides, frames treading apart on pavement running adjacently and then eyes flickered, eyelids battered and tongue tied. Where did the thought whirl from or any instance arise from, that it sparked such an uncontrollable burst of laughter. Eyes swayed, expressions changed and signals catched, may be there lies the cause or if said reason is something else. Sizzling chemistry, exceptional understanding, unfathomable love and above all, an enigmatic soul connection- here lies dormant the catalyst that keeps spurring the relation...

Fingers on keypad making grating sounds, raising bustling in office arena, mind though tranquil, swarming with creative ideas waiting to be penned down and eyes wobbling across the draft typed on desktop screen; amid of all this a tansition takes place and upsurges a burst of mind-boggling thoughts, some recollections and some meddle of created ones. 
Perception became clearer, perspective got more comprehensible and soon signals were coherent..two lanes running adjacently with one oozing with happiness, newness and variety and another crowded with clamours, detachments and dissonance..his fate gonna bring him face to face with success thereby trot on former lane...her fate gonna veer towards disharmony and pain, that is to say walk the latter one...a period which she'll live both through pain and happiness!..a taste on savoring which she'll experience both bitter and sweet. It's time things changed, improved or worsened! 

Acute discernment, she must have thought! He dznt want any disturbance even in the vista his eyes behold, and she was very well aware, he is highly inured to catching glimpse through each angle of her evry movement, every gesture, even when her lips sprawls to smile; her mouth bursts into chuckles; she shifts her face on the rested arm; she leisurely hovers her free hand over his broad torso, tries counting his abs protruding on his rib cage down to belly; and she commits impulsive follies for that he takes as sensual pleasures. This formed the reason, which triggered him obstruct her way while she strided to sit in the hall where they had planned for a show. Then he occupied the first seat and she slipped by his side on the seat close by his, as now his eyes were going to get real busy in observation, blocking all the frames, all shadows and all shapes from coming in the range of view.

A day of hearts with moments of love, with no beloved but many unworthies to shove. It was until morning off-the-work that she was free have her mind to herself and then, hurled thoughtful entreaties, earnest proposals and impassioned appeals. Each time it came,  sparked a turmoil within her that called for self-pity on her own helpless state and a simmering silent agitation for his absence. Finally as day subsided,  anger and wallowing also precipitated and that same old sweetness and delight came back, only on the first "call o'wild"..

It hurts, it cuts..O'yes, it pierces him and splits his heart into several pieces.."Don't talk, standing a step lower than abreast! Talk while you're on abutment", he spoke cuttingly to her and literally threw the words on her. It was a proof enough to prove, he loved, deeply so! " 'tis an inferiority complex, u know that!” He didn’t question, but explained to her. Little did he know, ‘tis the one factor she hated most, to be seen inferior. She dznt want to be seen superior, neither an inferior, but equal, equalised in all sectors of life, seen eye-to-eye and walked along shoulder-to-shoulder. How could then she see herself in this light? But, talking from behind while keeping the forefront vacant, looking for something better or may be, best, is something that is sensed as ‘inferiority complex’. Chagrin! Yet again.. It can’t be fathomed, and never will be, till she couldn’t elucidate it either by her words or her actions! This disarray of words, perplexity will always remain afloat.. quandary forever!!!

This is the day when the oath was taken at altar,
to love each moment and stand for every matter!
A marriage was formed which had led,
bonding of souls twain love clad!
Years passed by and the day kept coming,
with the intense fragrance and lullaby humming!
Renewal occurs and revives each word of honor,
love relights ohne passion emanating fervent ardour!
So, on this day of commemoration, I pray for a savor you delight,
that you find thine lady carrying an appeal not so slight!